“It’s okay, you’re okay”!
“Just calm down you’re fine”!
”You don’t need to cry about this”!
Do you say these things without thinking? I know I definitely do and it’s usually once I say them I think crap I should have responded differently.
Our reactions can make an impact so let’s start noticing our responses and work on responding in a positive way that validates emotions and we can become the space holders.
When children get upset over really ridiculous things, it can be tempting and automatic to minimise how they are feeling. It is out of habit and we are trying our hardest to de escalate a situation FAST! But dismissive reactions teach our children that the way they’re feeling is wrong.
Let’s HOLD SPACE for these emotions. Be physically, mentally, and emotionally present. Be a safe space to guide them through their emotions.
What we could say…..
“I see you feel frustrated, I understand why you feel that way”
“You must feel sad, do you want a hug?”
“It’s okay to cry!”